West Coast Travels

Musings from the Editor’s Chair, ElegantPlus.com

It’s been awhile since I’ve had a chance to post in the blog. Things have been very busy as we change over to Spring, warmer weather and upbeat, pretty and flirty fashions.

Over the last week, I’ve been on the road, traveling the other coast (west). It’s partly been a time to take a little break and enjoy the gorgeous California scenery, good company and change of pace. But, I’ve also taken the time do a little research and business.

As some know, I’ve an expertise in ancient Mediterranean jewelry that has led to an interest in both hand crafted modern and ethnic jewelry. The beginning of this trip found me immersed in a beading class taught by a Native American craftswoman who exhibits in places like the National Museum of the American Indian. Good stuff. I’m looking forward to taking my new found beading skills and cache of pretty bead finds home to combine with my smithing skills and cook up some new projects. I’ve also recently learned a Turkish felting technique, and am starting some textile surface design courses soon - including silk painting. I’m begining to be in desperate need of studio space for my “projects”……. when I’ll find time to do it all, in and around editing, management and design on Elegant Plus is anyone’s best guess. But I love the creative process and learning from acomplished artisans, so…… Stay tuned!

Back to the trip. A stop in at the San Francisco NORDSTROM gave me the opportunity to check out the selling floor compared to their on-line offerings, experience customer service first hand, and indulge in a little shopping for myself. I had a slim companion along who wanted to do some shopping of her own, so we began a customer service experiment.

First we went up to the Fourth Floor where “Encore” (the plus size section) was located - directly next to the Bistro. I’m going to try not to dwell too much on the potential meaning of the strategy of the location. The section was reasonably sized, well laid out and stocked. Dresses were scarcer than on-line, although they did have a (mostly black) formalwear section. But they did have the mosaic print dress I’ve had my eye on for awhile and it was even prettier in person (See the “Splurge” selection from the Feb 28 Fashion Finds on the main website). Since I have a cousin’s wedding to attend this fall, it was a serious contender for a purchase that afternoon. However, I instead fell in love with a beautiful Asian inspired pastel print satin jacket that will get more use. Dress it up to attend a wedding function with dress pants or a long lean skirt, or toss it on over jeans and heels for a more casual look. Unfortunately, it is not a style currently on-line. Who knows, I may yet return for the dress when I get home. It is still calling to my closet. Customer service was solicitous and stellar. The sales clerk opened dressing rooms, ran for alternative sizes, offered knowledgeable fit advice and helpfully got me settled on the catalog mailing list at check out. Several shoppers in the dressing room oohed and ahhed over eachother’s fashion parade, creating a fun and convivial clothes shopping experience. It was the urgings of several fellow shoppers that settled me on the jacket, actually. We were starting to see why NORDSTROM was known for its customer service. I felt welcome and cared for, regardless of my size.

Next stop, straight sizes for my friend. She had much more selection and her shopping was located on a lower floor, right next to the petite section. But the clerk there was just as helpful as the one I had encountered. In fact, it didn’t seem to matter which section we were browsing through, clerks greeted both of us and made eye contact. This clerk made sure I was comfortable and settled me on an overstuffed seat, included me in the fitting conversations with my friend and even hopefully asked if I’d be interested in browsing for myself while waiting? It didn’t seem to occur to her that her section didn’t fit my curves - a rather pleasant mistake, if you ask me. I did notice while browsing through the racks, that there were several fashionable styles that I had already seen upstairs in the plus section - including the jacket I had just purchased. While, I will still be mostly an on-line shopper with NORDSTROM since we don’t have one on the East Coast in my area, and I appreciate the quick shipping and excellent customer service that way, it was wonderful to experience a brick and mortar that treated every customer with solicitous respect and care.

My stay in San Francisco also included a stop into the headquarters of another on-line plus size shop known for excellent customer service, Igigi . It’s one of those rare shops that can have a formal gown to you the next day if you need it. And they have some of the best formal gowns for prom, informal weddings and bridesmaids going in plus sizes up to 32. My behind the scenes meeting and tour included a look at the total operation, previews of some upcoming styles and a good up close look at many of the dresses ready to ship. For more everyday wear, we still like the knit wrap dresses that can work for both business and more casual occasions. New are some pretty peasant and gypsy styles that come with sleeves or matching shrugs that allow you to go bare or covered. For any boutique owners looking for wholesale, remember that’s available from them too.

Less than a day left, and then it’s a long flight and drive back. It’s been great to be away, but I’m ready for my own bed.

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Womb to Grow, Pages from a Curvy Mom’s Life
 Pregnant and Nothing to Wear

by Monica Rasso for ElegantPlus.com

On my darkest day of pregnancy, somewhere in my ninth or tenth month (yes, there are 10 months of pregnancy… go count!), I would muffle my cries in my pillow while tending a gladiator-beaten back and think “Am I the only person who feels like a lopsided whale?”  There were no clothes that fit me right.  Don’t even ask about undergarments!  I was hungry, but nothing sounded good.  Tired, but no position was comfortable.  Then after a few minutes of self-pity, the guilt of my selfishness would hit me.  There was a life forming inside of me.  And I would tell myself that all I have to do is make it just a few more weeks. 

 I asked some of my friends who recently had children or are presently pregnant to answer a few questions for me so that I could write this column.  From what my friends have shared with me, whether we gained 15 or 80 pounds during pregnancy, somewhere in the ninth month, each one of us wanted that kid to pop out a few weeks early!  But even those with the worst self-esteem during pregnancy are so humbled and proud to be creating a life.  One of my friends said “even though I was fat according to my own body standards, I LOVED being pregnant!”  I discovered that even though we feared the uncertain, were anxious about the future, and complained of our ailments during pregnancy… somehow all of that is resolved as soon as that baby is placed in our arms.          

So how much weight is the “right” amount to gain?  What a great question.  The truth is that as long as your doctor says that you are healthy and you feel good, you’re doing fine.  The scary part comes when pregnant women have to deal with high cholesterol, gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, or anything else that puts her life or her baby’s life in danger.  Other than that, there is no “right” amount to gain.    

 There are self-esteem issues that go along with any weight gain, whether during pregnancy or not.  To my surprise, what I’ve learned is that most women are accepting of the temporary gain.  A weight gain of 40, 60, or 80 lbs is not the end of the world.  Keep in mind, no matter how much you have gained that many, many women have gained as much weight or more than you have. The words “fat” and “pregnant” are not synonymous.   If you are pregnant, you are not fat.  Period.   Don’t focus on a number on a scale.  Instead, focus on eating right during pregnancy and worry about perfecting your health later.  That will probably include losing weight, but it is more about getting your own body back (during pregnancy it is shared with a baby).   

Ah, then the “later” arrives.  Many of my friends have lost all or most of their “baby weight” within the first year after the baby is born.  But we all agree that our bodies are just, well…. different.  All of us struggle with the waistline changes and an overall “drooping” of body parts.  Most have stretch marks.  I had a lot of skin discoloration that thankfully went away within three months.  You either have to accept the changes or work to change them.  Don’t use the excuse “if I only had more time.”  You’ll make time if it is important.  It is important to find time for yourself after the baby is born.  Whether you spend that exercising, reading, shopping, or whatever, you need to remember yourself as individual and not just a mommy, wife, maid, cook, or milk maker.    

As for fashion during pregnancy, it seems pretty universal that if you were fashionable before you got pregnant that you’d also try to do so during pregnancy.  Descriptive phrases such as “cute” or “glowing” seem to replace “pretty or “sexy”.  Unfortunately, many women do not feel sexy or have partners that are less interested in them sexually during pregnancy.  It seems that men act like that possibly out of fear of harming the baby (or possibly because they are jerks).  Other women feel a blossoming during pregnancy and really exude an attractive, happy glow. In a past column, I tore up some companies for not offering bigger maternity choices for plus-size women.  The truth is, there are going to be days when nothing fits right.  Other days, you may feel “cute” and “glowing” with your clothing choices.  As my friend Sara in Georgia says, “Remember your hormones are out of whack!”   Your feelings and actions are all tied into those crazy hormones and some days are just going to be tough!

I read something striking in one of those forwarded-way-too-many-times email messages.  It said something like “I loved my body during pregnancy because it was the only time that I could assist God in creating a miracle.”  Pause and think about that.  You assisted in creating a miracle…. How humbling is that?  Whether you believe in a higher power or not, if you have ever had the pleasure of feeling a life grow inside of you… you have assisted in a miracle. Many times during pregnancy I would feel my baby move inside of me and feel overwhelmed with love and honor.  And since he was born, I ask myself each day what I did to deserve him.  If you are pregnant now and feel like a circus tent, know that you are a beautiful miracle maker.  Remember, more now than ever, that it is what’s inside that counts. 

Monica Rasso © 2006

Elegant Plus maintains a plus-size maternity clothing directory for those looking for something to wear during those beautiful, glowing months.

Monica has recently started a new home based business allowing her to both create a safe environment for her precious baby boy and spend more time at home. Find out more about the environmentally safe products she sells or learn how you can start your own home based business by visiting: Melaleuca and Safe Healthy Family .

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