April 12, 2008

Self-Esteem and Body Image: Creating Powerful Girls, Part I

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Kiss My Assets Column at Elegant Plus Magazine

Creating  Powerful Girls

by Dr. Robyn Silverman

It’s that time again. The diet commercials are in full force which can only mean two things; bathing suit season is right around the corner and nationwide body image is getting ready to plummet. Many adults worry that between all the talk about buff bodies and diet plans, girls will slip into a self esteem slump. How can we help girls to elevate their self worth without needing to go on and on about loving your body?

Confidence and self worth, both positive and negative, can influence how a person feels, thinks, and acts throughout childhood and adulthood. Those who have strong feelings of confidence and high self worth will feel more positive about themselves, think more positively, and act and behave more positively than those who have low self confidence and low self worth. In addition, girls with strong feelings of confidence and high self worth will like who they see in the mirror each day and know that they are worthy of love.

Girls are looking to the women in their lives to show them the ropes. Whether you are a parent, big sister, teacher, or friend of a girl, you can inspire girls to become confident in themselves by following these tips:

Help them to realize her unique gifts:

Everyone is talented or special in some way. While we are not all little Einsteins or mini- Monets, everyone has something to offer. Let her know that you appreciate their gifts. Allow her to show you what she can do—without doing it for her! She will get better with time. Hang up artwork, projects, or awards that exhibit these gifts so that your child knows that you value her special talents. Creating a Wall of Fame will allow her to see all of her accomplishments.

Be present:

When a girl is sharing new knowledge or new gifts, pay attention! This is the time to shut off the TV and the cell phone. When you do this, she will know that she is important and worthy of your undivided attention.

Don’t over-praise:

You can let her know that she is special without over-praising. Not everything she does is worthy of the Wall of Fame. She can’t always be super, perfect and fantastic. When you praise a girl when praise is due, she will know you are being genuine and that she has really done a good job.

Be a RAD role model (Reliable, Accountable, and Dependable):

While you may not always be available when she needs you, create a pattern of responsiveness and responsibility. Be on time, be reliable, and follow through with what you say you are going to do. When you are a RAD role model, she will know that she can count on you and that she is worthy of your follow through. She will also learn what it means to be a positive role model to others.

Praise effort:

It may be easy to focus on a high mark on a paper or a gold medal, but it’s really important to praise effort instead of results. When a girl knows that she has worked hard and that hard work is praised, she will likely keep putting in the effort to make the accomplishment. When we are results driven, failure can stop us in our tracks and make us give up for fear of failing once again.

When we take the time to instill confidence in girls, they become a little bit stronger everyday. Then they can call upon that strength when they are feeling low or bombarded with negative, body-bashing messages. The strength of positive mentors carries on even when you’re not around!

Until next time (and the next 5 tips)!

____________

About the Author

Dr. Robyn J.A. Silverman is a Massachusetts-based child and adolescent development specialist and body image expert whose programs and services are used worldwide. She is also a success coach for parents and educators, who are looking to achieve their goals, improve their lives or improve the lives of others. She is a writer and professional speaker who presents to PTAs, schools, businesses and organizations that focus on children or families. Interested in doing some coaching with Dr. Robyn or having Dr. Robyn present a seminar at your school or business? Go to DrRobynSilverman.com for more information.

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October 24, 2007

Stilettos and Curves Traveling Plus-Size Fashion Show

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Stilettos and Curves Traveling Plus-Size Fashion Show
Whistle-Stop: Detroit, Michigan

by Lisa Klobucar,  Hello Gorgeous! Self-Esteem Columnist at Elegant Plus Magazine

Curvy, rubenesque, voluptuous and zaftig are all words to describe the fuller figure. I had the good fortune to attend a fashion show Sunday night (October 21, 2007) at the Cobo Center in Detroit, Michigan that celebrated women who embodied those words: the “Stilettos and Curves” fashion show. Not your average fashion show, Stilettos and Curves is part of a growing grass-roots self-esteem movement across the United States that marries fashion with plus-size models to show big girls can, do, and deserve to look fabulous.  It joins the likes of the pioneering Hips, Heels and Curves Tour from DeVoe Signature Events out of New York City, the Simply Couture Tour out of Los Angeles, and the Divabetic Tour, to name just a few, that are criss-crossing the country, plus numerous local and regional shows that are shouting this positive message from the catwalks. Mo’Nique may have taken the movement sleek and Hollywood style with her enormously popular Fat Chance televised plus model boot camp and competition, but this type of urban event is where it all started.  This wasn’t just a simple fashion show, it was a fashion EVENT!

To see gorgeous, big girls, not just walking the runway but strutting their stuff in glamorous, well fitting and stunning clothes was truly exciting. These ladies knew they looked great and their confidence showed in the way they came down that runway. Outfit after outfit was presented on models of varying sizes and shapes, none smaller than a curvaceous size 14 with sizes as large as 30, while every shape of curves from apple to pear was dressed to kill. No matter the outfit or the model it was a celebration of curves. No wafer thin, “Twiggy’s” on this runway! This was a runway for the woman of size, substance, and style.

This wonderful fashion extravaganza was presented by the Full Figured Diva Academy. Who knew that there was a place to celebrate the “Diva” in all of us?

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Plus models strut their stuff at the Stilettos and Curves Fashion Show

The Show

The sell-out crowd was an awesome mix of men, women and children. They were all charged and ready to see this show. Once the lights dimmed, the clapping started even before the first model had appeared on the stage. There were two little boys there cheering on their mom as she walked the runway. Deafening enthusiasm washed around me as the models came out. Cheers, shouts, whoops and whistles were the order of the evening, both in appreciation of the fashions being shown and for the models themselves.

The fashion show featured clothing from local stores, so the outfits were very accessible and affordable for anyone attending. Most of the stores were all very familiar big name brands like Lane Bryant, Torrid and Ashley Stewart to name a few. In every color of the rainbow, the clothing styles ranged from business attire, to casual weekend wear. There was even a section on formal evening wear. I saw several dresses that I would love to wear for some holiday gala or New Year’s Eve party.

While there were outfits that could easily run into the hundreds of dollars, there were also plenty of outfits for every size and budget imaginable. The fact that all the Divas were various shapes and sizes brought home the point of there is a outfit for every size. One of the models, Relita Clarke, has been a runway model for six years and she’s always been a plus model.  She told me, “I love being in an organization where everyone looks like me and to have that empowerment is a wonderful thing. We are trying to send the fashion industry a message. A message that not only thin women can do this.”

The one thing that really stood out with Stilettos and Curves Fashion Show was that each model wore colors that complimented her. In the big runway shows you never see that kind of nod to reality. The designers usually put the models in whatever fits best, applies make-up, and doesn’t worry about color. This show took the time to showcase clothes that put the models in the best light not only for the styles being displayed but for them personally, just like real women in the audience who were looking to them for inspiration ought to do.

For this big girl sitting in the audience and watching these women walk down the runway I felt exhilarated and inspired. The Divas looked great and they knew it, it showed on their faces. The audience loved the way the models looked as it was hardly ever quiet with clapping and shouts of encouragement throughout the hour and a half show. I have to admit after watching the Divas come down the runway, I felt the need to strut my stuff as I walked out the door.  I think their mission was accomplished.

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All shapes of curves shown in casual and eveningwear

 

The Women Behind the Show

Natasha Bryson, 30, is the director of the “Diva Academy” and she also runs Gemini Modeling and Talent Group in Baltimore, Maryland. Natasha has graced the runway in many shows and is not your typical big girl. In fact she is not a big girl at all. She’s an extremely slender woman, but she’s in our corner. Natasha’s recognition for the need of big girl fashions prompted her to open the Full Figured Diva Academy several years ago. The Diva Academy includes a four week boot camp for aspiring models and women who just want to learn to strut their stuff and improve their confidence and fashion sense. Like most plus-size fashion and model boot camps, Diva’s are taught to not only walk the runway but also how to wear the clothes and how to walk confidently in 3 inch heels. Also included are makeup and hair tips that can be applied to your everyday life, not just on the runway.

I asked Natasha how she finds her Divas?  “Our advertising is pretty much a grass roots effort with email and radio spots, and of course word of mouth. Many of our Divas have come to us from friends of friends.”  The success of such methods was all around me Sunday night with a packed, sold-out show  which truly speaks of the hunger and demand for such shows in opposition to our “thin is in” culture. Natasha ‘s attitude in regards to all women shows when she says things like, “My goal is to have women feel good about themselves no matter their size. I feel that you have to work with what you have been given and improve on yourself from there.” Following up on the self-esteem message of these grass-root shows, Diva Tammara Zanders (Sponsorship Coordinator) added, “we are striving for a consistent presence not only in fashion but in ourselves.”

Don’t think that all these women do is walk the runway, they all have careers outside of the Academy too. For example, Kimberly Badru is one of the original Divas. She has been with the Full Figured Diva Academy for three years, but she is also the director of a catering company. Kimberly became involved with the Diva’s not only for herself but to give her daughter a positive role model. She wants to show her daughter that she can be and do anything she sets her mind to in life.

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Trendy business wear and classic evening
styles come down the runway

The Tour

The Full Figured Diva Academy is currently on tour showcasing “Stilettos and Curves.” The tour has been to Pennsylvania, Virginia and Michigan. The next stop on the tour is Maryland. While in Maryland they will hold a four week, two hours a day boot camp and then present the fashion show with the local Divas who attended the boot camp as well as the national Diva’s who travel with the show.

So are you ready to be a Diva? Or maybe you just want to check out the next fashion show. You can find out more information by clicking here.

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October 1, 2007

6 Tips to Help your Child Cope with Feeling Fat in a “Thin is In” World

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Six Tips to Help your Child Cope with Feeling Fat in a “Thin is In” World

By Dr. Robyn Silverman, Kiss My Assets Column at Elegant Plus Magazine

[This article was first published in Bay State Parent magazine as a Parenting 1,2,3 article]

You probably wouldn’t believe it if you had heard it yourself. MaryBeth, a mother of three, came to me in a panic. Her daughter, Madeline, who had recently turned six years old, had been standing outside by the pool with her two friends, Hallie and Rachel, when the snubbing began. Marybeth witnessed Madeline’s two friends slapping their bellies and whispering to each other. Hallie spoke first. “You can’t be our friend anymore, Maddie, ‘cause you’re 55 pounds and we’re only 45 and 47 ½ pounds.” Rachel continued, “Yeah, 6 year olds like us shouldn’t weigh more than 50 pounds. If you are, it means you’re fat… and fat people are ugly.” At that, Madeline ran to her Mom, and whimpered, “Mommy, am I fat and ugly?” while the other girls jumped into the pool.

As a body image and child development specialist, I believe I have heard it all. Too fat. Too short. Too flat. Too big. Too scrawny. These stories, while plentiful, are never easy to hear. 

We used to think that “fitting in” had mostly to do with how your personality meshes with your friends. But in today’s world, when everywhere from Hollywood to New York is preaching extreme thinness, “fitting in” seems to have more to do with how you appear on the outside rather than who you are the inside. And, unfortunately, those parents who thought that they didn’t have to worry about body image issues until their children became teens are being sideswiped in the head by a large dose of reality. 

No child should ever feel that s/he is “worth less” because of how s/he looks. When it comes to society’s messages that “thin is in” and “fat is faulty” what can we do to help our children remember that it’s what’s inside that counts?

Tip 1. Show children that everyone comes in different sizes

Let them know that on the normal bell curve for weight, children fall in all different places. Some are lighter and some are heavier. It’s normal for children to gain weight at different rates and at different times during their childhood. Some shoot up like weeds and then gain weight while others gain weight and then grow taller. What’s important is that each child is healthy and active NOT that each child is at the average weight for his or her age group. Of course, if you’re concerned about your child’s weight or weight progression, contact your pediatrician for advice.

Tip 2. Don’t compare

Even within families, siblings will put on weight at different times and at different rates. Pointing out that one of your children is putting weight on faster or is heavier than another sibling, can be interpreted as a criticism that s/he is not fitting in to what is “normal.” Given societal messages regarding dieting and thinness, especially those delivered to young girls, it’s easy for children to interpret seemingly innocuous comparative comments as judgments of a child’s worth.

Tip 3. Watch the media that comes into your house

A lot of magazines and TV shows hail thin frames and denigrate bodies that are not thin enough according to Hollywood standards. When someone once said, “a picture’s worth a thousand words” they were right. Research shows that media has a large impact on the way children feel about themselves and how they judge others. If you see something that celebrates very thin figures or denigrates those who are not thin, talk about it and ask your children what their take is on the subject. TV shows and books that confirm that people come in all shapes and sizes, can also be extremely helpful. (I use a self-published book for my own presentations on this topic. If interested, please contact me directly through www.DrRobynSilverman.com)

Tip 4. Be aware of your own language and behaviors

 If you’re hyper-focused on weight and looks, your child will pick up on it. As they say, “monkey see, monkey do.” You are your children’s role model and superhero. They want to be just like you and they want you to be proud of them. So when a parent looks in the mirror and says “yuck,” their children may wonder if you think the same thing about them. Young people follow your lead so be sure to show them what a healthy body image (not just a healthy lifestyle) looks like.

Tip 5. Expose them to different activities and people

 When children have the opportunity to meet different kinds of people and do different activities, they learn about and develop strengths. Other people show them that children can be good at all different things and how someone looks does not determine their worth or their abilities. A wide array of activities like team sports, martial arts, hip-hop dance and drama can help children develop confidence in what they can do and who they can be without hyper-focusing on weight and appearance.

Tip 6. Stress your values

 Raising your children to determine their true friends by who they are and not by how they look is helpful in several ways. First, they’ll attract people who think similarly. Second, they’ll be more apt to judge themselves by the strength of their values rather than how thin they are. And third, they’ll be less apt to surround themselves with people who base friendship on appearance.

But most of all, be patient and supportive. Be prepared for your children to change shape and size often during childhood. Growing up and out can be confusing and even anxiety-provoking for children who are trying to “fit in.” Helping all young people feel worthwhile, valued and capable, no matter what weight they are, is vital to the development of positive body image and self esteem.

Body Image expert, Dr. Robyn J.A. Silverman, is a Massachusetts-based child and adolescent development specialist whose programs and services are used worldwide. She is also a success coach for parents, adolescents, and educators, who are looking to achieve their goals, improve their lives or improve the lives of others. She is a writer and professional speaker who presents to PTAs, schools, parents, and organizations that focus on children or families. Interested in doing some coaching with Dr. Robyn or having Dr. Robyn present a seminar at your child’s school or at your business? Go to DrRobynSilverman.com for more information.

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September 12, 2007

Meet Pat Ballard: Queen of Rubenesque Romances

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Meet Pat Ballard:
Queen of Rubenesque Romances

by Lisa Klobucar, Regular Contributor to Elegant Plus Magazine

Elegant Plus  is pleased to have author Pat Ballard share some of her work and wisdom with us. Pat has written such novels as, Abigail’s Revenge and A Worthy Heir.  Her central female characters are BBW’s.  Pat, who is the self proclaimed, “Queen of Rubenesque Romances” writes witty, romantic tales of men and women who struggle and fall in love. If you are looking for a time out, these are novels that are the perfect escape.

EP: In Abigail’s Revenge, the central character, Abigail is a Plus-size woman. You have the male character Desh, describe her rounded, full frame and her beauty, “…don’t ever be ashamed of your beauty. Don’t run from it. You are a beautiful woman.”

Do you feel that larger women tend to shy away from their curves, their beauty over all?

PB: I think, in most cases, it’s very hard for larger women to accept and believe that they can be beautiful. On a daily basis, we’re told that we can’t be beautiful if we aren’t tall, thin and young.

EP: When writing Abigail’s Revenge, did you have someone in mind for the character of Abigail or was she a product of a fertile and active imagination?

PB: Abigail was mostly a product of my imagination. I wrote the prologue of Abigail’s Revenge one day, just “playing around” with a different writing style. Just to prove that I could write in a more “mysterious” voice than I usually do. I liked the prologue, so I sent it to several reading friends and their reaction was very strong. So I decided to tell Abigail’s story.

EP: The characters within Abigail’s Revenge are rather startled to see Abigail’s new larger frame. Yet, Abigail feels good being a larger woman and makes no apologies for her larger voluptuous figure. Do you feel that Plus-size women need to take a stand for themselves and accept who they are size and all?

PB: Abigail knew a lot of hunger in her childhood, so when she was sent to prison and started having regular meals, her body sought and found its natural fullness. So Abigail couldn’t grasp the concept that she should make herself hungry again by dieting just to be skinny like she used to be. And that’s the point I was trying to bring out to my readers. Each of us has our own mold that our bodies fight to maintain. When we diet, 99% of us gain it right back if we aren’t hungry. So, yes, each of us should accept the size we are, look the world in the face and say, “Hello! This is me! I’m not apologizing for who I am. And I’m not changing who I am just because society thinks I should.”

 EP: The lead female characters in, Abigail’s Revenge and A Worthy Heir are Plus-size women who face personal and emotional obstacles by other characters within  the book due to their size. Do you feel that larger women are treated in a similar fashion say within the workplace, their homes, or in general by society overall?

PB: Yes. I use these other characters in my books to bring out the issues that larger women face. I always have the “opposition” character that I use as the mouthpiece of what we hear and have to deal with every day in our society.

EP: Your books have an underlying tone of self-acceptance and even on your website you have, “10 Steps to Loving your Body”.  Do you feel that in today’s thin-centric society it is important for women of any size to wave their self acceptance banners and proclaim, “I like who I am?”

PB: In two of my books, Nobody’s Perfect and A Worthy Heir, my heroines come into the story as self-confident women. There’s a lot of “me” in those heroines. In three of my books, His Brother’s Child, Wanted: One Groom and Abigail’s Revenge, I’ve brought the heroines into the story not quite as confident. The reason I did this is because I wanted to address some of the issues that most of us have had to deal with, or are still dealing with when it comes to self-acceptance. But what I try to accomplish at the end of my books is to have all my heroines, and hopefully the reader, feeling so good about themselves that they want to walk out into the street and shout, “Hey world! I like me just the way I am!” No matter what size they are. My goal is to remind all women… of any and every size that we’re okay just the way we are.

EP: What inspired you to write about larger characters in your novels?  Do you feel that any of your characters are a personal reflection of yourself?

PB: I discovered romance novels when I was a teenager. My favorite author, at the time, was Emily Loring. I loved her books because they weren’t just romance novels. They also had wonderful “life-messages” written into the story. I knew I wanted to write novels, but I wanted my novels to have a message that would make the reader feel better about themselves when they’d finished my book(s). But at the time, and until I was 33 years old, I was busy starving myself, trying to stay thin.

After I stopped dieting and decided to love whatever body that developed from eating healthily and exercising moderately, I realized that there was no representation of us “big girls” in the media, movies, or books. Then, one day, that proverbial light bulb went off over my head… romance novels with Big Beautiful Heroines. I immediately started my first novel with a Big Beautiful Heroine, Nobody’s Perfect.

Actually, I think all my heroines have a little of me in them. After all, they’re seeing the world through my eyes.

EP:  Do you have any words of wisdom or self encouragement you would like to pass onto other women who read your books?

PB: Just like a snowflake, each one of us is unique. Each one of us is a one-of-a-kind work of art. There never has been, nor will  there ever be another individual like us. So we don’t have the right not to love ourselves.__________________________

 In addition to romance novels Pat is working on her first non-fiction book, 10 Steps To Loving Your Body, that should be in print by late spring or early summer. If you would like to know more about Pat Ballard and other works by her, please visit her web site.

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September 5, 2007

Fat… So? : Promoting health AND size-acceptance

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Fat… So? 

Human beings come in all sizes.  How can we promote health …. and size-acceptance in our schools?

by  Camille Jackson of Tolerance.org
Reprinted with permission at Elegant Plus Magazine

As the “War on Obesity” heats  up, in schools across the country kids who are heavier than their classmates experience size bias and even outright bullying from peers and adults.  And, school health programs can sometimes hurt more than they help. Experts from the size-acceptance community, whose views are often omitted from health debates, offer a fresh perspective: eat healthy foods, stay active, and don’t worry about your weight and size.

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 Article title based on Marilyn Wann’s book,  
  Fat! So? Because You Don’t Have to Apologize for Your Size

 ”I’m the biggest in my family and I have the best cholesterol and blood sugar,” announces Kevin, a junior at Sequoia High School in Redwood City, Calif. He has just walked an extra-long distance for a late lunch of salad topped with grilled chicken strips and ranch dressing, followed by chocolate chip cookies. He came to the school’s Teen Resource Center to make a point about stereotypes.

“I play three sports, I ride my bike, I walk everywhere and I’m still the same size,” he says, insisting his health is better than some of his thinner classmates.

Looking at his larger-than-average size, some doubt Kevin is as healthy as he claims. But Marlene Schwartz, co-director of the Yale Center for Eating and Weight Disorders, says it’s quite likely Kevin’s weight may not negatively affect his health.

“I believe if a child is eating a nutritionally balanced diet and is active, if he or she has a higher BMI [body mass index], it doesn’t matter,” says Schwartz.

Schwartz routinely hears people say, “If only fat people worked harder, they would lose weight.” But she and others challenge the hysteria surrounding the global “obesity epidemic,” which defines 17 percent of children age 2 to 19 as overweight.

Paul Campos, author of The Obesity Myth, argues that Americans are, in general, only 15 pounds heavier than they were 20 years ago. It is public health standards, not our bodies, that have changed, becoming more rigid in defining the majority of Americans as “overweight.”

That news is small consolation for students subjected to harassment and prejudice, sometimes unrelentingly, from peers and teachers because they are heavier than others. Many have been frightened into hating their bodies by grim medical reports about childhood obesity. Too many believe that dieting is the only solution, even though study after study shows dieting doesn’t work.

Michael Loewy, a psychology professor at the University of North Dakota, paints an unsettling picture in his essay Working with Fat Children in Schools: “It is amazing that so many fat children survive adolescence, given the hatred and meanness directed at them.”

‘I Put Myself Down’

At Sequoia High School’s Teen Resource Center, Dana Schuster, a speaker with the Health at Every Size program, has gathered a group of students to discuss how the war on obesity has taken a toll on their self-esteem.

“In my family they tell me, ‘You’d look nice if you were smaller,’” says Celia, 15.

“I think I put myself down more than anyone,” adds Rachel, 18, referring to the negative thoughts filling her head about her size.

One girl says she’s more confident and accepting of herself now that she’s in high school, yet she’s just finished a juice fast, essentially starving herself. “I felt good. I lost the 10 pounds,” she says.

Naomi, 16, listens quietly to other students’ comments about the frustrations of gym class and clothes shopping. Then she says simply, “It hurts when you weigh a lot.”

Victims of size discrimination often suffer from depression, anxiety and loneliness. They may also suffer from low self-esteem, voluntarily serving as the butt of jokes — the stereotypical funny fat kid.

“If they say things to you, it doesn’t matter,” says Max, one of two boys in the group, shrugging his shoulders. Max says he responds to insults with humor.

Naomi does, too. But she also has a more straightforward comeback: “I tell them, ‘It’s my body; if you don’t like it, don’t look at it.’”

ALL sizes

Children learn anti-fat attitudes from many sources, including adults who talk negatively about their own bodies or who allow size-based teasing to go unchecked.

“A lot of people who don’t have this [size] difference aren’t aware how painful it can be,” says Frances Berg, a nutritionist and international authority on weight and eating based in North Dakota. “When someone tells a fat joke, the response should not be to laugh, or even to be silent.”

Many students say teachers or other adults rarely speak up about size bias, embracing the myth that thin always is better than fat.

It’s a myth some see the medical community presenting as fact.

“If one already prejudges fat people as gluttonous or lazy, it is not very difficult to think that they are also sick,” writes J. Eric Oliver in Fat Politics. That means even a visit to the school nurse doesn’t feel safe for some fat kids who are used to the medical community trying to “fix” their size.

Connie Sobczak, executive director of Body Positive, a nonprofit based in Berkeley, Calif., that helps teens with body issues, says the medical community does a disservice to thin kids by focusing solely on kids who are overweight.

“There are so many [children of all sizes] who aren’t eating well, and not [being active],” Sobczak says. “We ignore all those children, then we focus and shame the fat children.”

Size-related stereotypes, of course, work both ways — against fat and thin kids.

“We can’t just talk about it as an issue for fat kids. The ones who are ‘perfect’ get overlooked, too. It’s hard for them to talk about being blond and thin and looking like Barbie,” says Debora Burgard, a California psychotherapist and creator of BodyPositive.com (unrelated to the Body Positive group in Berkeley). “They have a stereotyping problem, too.”

Those prone to believe one stereotype often are prone to embrace other stereotypes, as well.

“In fact,” writes Oliver in Fat Politics, “people who have strong anti-fat attitudes also tend to be more hostile toward minorities and the poor.”

Stigma-by-association also exists. A recent study by British psychologist Jason Halford shows that prejudice against fat people is so strong that biases are also formed against people who associate with fat people.

Fear of Fat

Responding to concerns about childhood obesity, John S. Martinez School in New Haven, Conn., was one of the first K-8 public schools in its district to rid its campus of junk food. Last year the school hosted a pilot program introducing more physical activity, healthier cafeteria foods and nutrition education.

The inner-city school with predominantly Latino students offers swim classes using the school’s state-of-the-art pool. Students also can earn 30 to 45 extra minutes of gym class each day. The school’s health clinic monitors each child’s health and weight loss.

One physical education teacher says she sees the effects of the obesity epidemic firsthand, with younger children being diagnosed with hypertension, diabetes and elevated cholesterol levels.

“Most of them get on the scales without problems,” she says, but for other students the process is “stressful” and “hard to approach.” She contacts parents to discuss the best ways to intervene.

One winter afternoon, with snowflakes swirling outside the windows, several 7th- and 8th-graders gather at the school to talk about what happens when their parents get that kind of call.

“I hate it,” says Michelle, 13. “My mother makes me drink diet soda.”

The 8th-graders say all these efforts to get or keep them thin — eliminating vending machines, serving salads for lunch, increasing their gym time — have increased their fear rather than reduced their weight.

Twelve-year-old Arianna worries about high cholesterol. The message she gets from her parents and her doctor is that she must lose weight to get healthy. “I get depressed if I think about it too much,” she says. When she’s depressed, Arianna confesses, she sneaks Snickers and Milky Ways.

Emily worries her extra weight could lead to a heart attack. “I’m not going to be big in high school,” says the 12-year-old, shaking her head from side to side. “No, I’m going to go on a diet.”

Focus on fitness, not weight

In 2003, Arkansas was the first state to require schools to chart its students’ BMIs. Three years later, the state’s percentage of heavy school children remains the same: 38 percent. But another statistic has emerged: 13 percent of parents reported that their children had been teased because of the new program, according to the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette. Weighing children regularly does not help them become thin, says Miriam Berg, president of the national Council on Size & Weight Discrimination. Berg believes promoting weight loss as public policy is misguided for three reasons:

  • the policy targets fat kids and promotes discrimination against them;
  • teaches all kids that fatness should be avoided at all costs, resulting in dangerous diet practices and eating disorders; and
  • ignores the nutritional, exercise and health needs of kids who are average weight or thinner than average.

Instead of forced weighings and BMI checks that focus all attention on heavier kids, Schwartz, of the Yale Center for Eating and Weight Disorders, says schools should develop creative ways to get all students more active. She suggests PE classes that emphasize different choices of movement, not just team sports.

Laura Perdikomatis, chair of Woodside High School’s physical education department in Woodside, Calif., couldn’t agree more.

“I think we’re turning them off,” she says, of mandated fitness tests that are harder for larger students to complete.

She says coaches, who often use running as a punishment, sometimes stand in the way of progress. Perdikomatis has heard a group of PE teachers, for example, laugh at the very concept of Health At Every Size.

“They think everyone should be the same size,” she says.

Perdikomatis just received a grant to furnish her high school’s fitness center with games like the interactive “Dance, Dance, Revolution” and a stationary bike/Play Station II combination. The equipment is not only fun, Perdikomatis says, but it also puts the focus on heart rate rather than on the mechanics of a fitness test.

Frances Berg, founder of the Healthy Weight Journal, says that’s the way it should be.

“It’s important to practice healthy habits no matter how much you weigh,” Berg says. “It’s not the weight; it’s how active you are. (And) kids have to enjoy what they’re doing, or else it won’t work.”

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 Teaching Tolerance’s educational kits and subscriptions to its magazine are FREE to: classroom teachers, school librarians, school counselors, school administrators, professors of education, leaders of homeschool networks, youth directors at houses of worship and employees of youth-serving nonprofit organizations.

More size-acceptance resources from Tolerance.org include:

 

Tips For Teachers
People usually think about diversity in terms of ethnicity, class, gender and ability. Fat children also have a unique perspective on the world. Learn to see fat children as a valid part of diversity

 

LABELS: The ‘O’ Words
The size acceptance community embraces the label “fat” over words like “obese” and “overweight.”

 

Kids Come In All Sizes
Use this workshop to teach all students to feel good about their bodies.

 

This Story at Work
Do you possess anti-fat biases? Take a free, confidential online and find out what’s lurking in your subconscious. After taking the test, try to identify steps you can take to offset or minimize biases you may hold related to size or other factors.

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